Soft Guy Era / Drizzle Drizzle

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About

Soft Guy Era is a slang term associated with the expression Drizzle Drizzle, which is used to describe a man who proudly acts "soft" by refusing to date broke women and adhere to traditional male gender norms, such as being the primary provider for their girlfriend, instead wanting their partner to pamper and provide for them. The term was popularized on TikTok in April 2024 by TikTokers @scarfacemark and @lil.goodiee as an ironic response to and parody of entitled women who are excused for negative or self-serving behaviors, such as proudly refusing to be with men who won't pay their way in life. Specifically, it parodies the term "soft girl era," which went viral in 2023 as a way of defining a woman who wants to live a "soft," stress-free life on their own terms and reject the girlboss lifestyle. The term "drizzle drizzle" is often used in the videos and is a parody of the term "sprinkle sprinkle," which went viral on TikTok in 2023 as a way of essentially saying "bless your heart."

Origin

In 2023, some women on TikTok began posting videos announcing they were in their "soft girl era," essentially meaning they try to live a drama and stress-free life with an emphasis on self-care. The "soft girl era" has been suggested to be a rejection of the "girlboss" lifestyle, which focuses on empowerment through hard work and independence, with Glamour^[5] publishing an article in October 2023 wondering if the era is a "backward slide into patriarchal norms."

TikToker @scarfacemark is known for his ironic videos hyping up a "soft guy" lifestyle, essentially meaning the refusal of being the provider in a male-female relationship and putting an emphasis on being pampered and taken care of.

For example, on March 21st, 2024, the TikToker^[1] posted a video in which he claims to have broken up with his girlfriend of five years because she was "too perfect" and provided for him so much (gave him a car, paid his bills, etc.) she "upped his standards," garnering over 5.9 million views in a month (shown below, left).

He admitted the video was a joke later that month, highlighting how many people fell for it and gave him flack on X for it while also pointing out a perceived double standard, claiming if a woman said the same thing she'd be praised online (shown below, right).^[2]

In April 2024, TikTokers @lil.goodiee and @scarfacemark began posting further videos hyping up the idea of being in your "soft guy era" as a further response to what they see as the negative attitudes of entitled women.

On April 1st, @scarfacemark posted a video to TikTok^[3] reacting to a clip of a man talking about how his wife provides for him, hyping the man up, garnering over 430,000 views in a week (shown below, left).

That same day, @lil.goodie posted a video to TikTok^[4] where he repeatedly claims to be in his "soft guy era" while criticizing a girl for not paying his way, taking him on a cheap date and being "broke," garnering over 1.2 million views in a week (shown below, right). This is the first known use of the term "soft guy era."

Spread

The term inspired other TikTokers to post videos claiming to be in their soft guy era, while others either criticized or supported the videos and idea. Some women began accusing men of wanting the soft guy lifestyle of being gay. On April 8th, 2024, YouTuber^[6] Chisha Zed posted a video about the soft guy era movement, garnering over 20,000 views in two days (shown below).

On April 9th, TikToker^[7] @advicefromawife101 posted a video responding to the "soft guy era" movement, ultimately agreeing with the idea of it, garnering over 500,000 views in a day (shown below, left). On the same day, TikToker^[8] @theasiafrances posted a more critical video on the movement, garnering over 47,000 views in a day (shown below, right).

Later that day on April 9th, 2024, TikToker^[9] @milliondollarrenter posted a comedic video about being in his soft guy era and losing money on the stock market, expecting a woman to earn it back for him, garnering over 560,000 views in a day (shown below, left). That day, TikToker^[10] @paul007scott posted a similar video joking about being in his soft guy era, garnering over 250,000 views in a day (shown below, right).

That same day, YouTuber^[11] Get going with Maryjane posted a video ranting against the idea of the soft guy era, discussing testosterone and the biological differences between women that, in her opinion, make the soft guy era impractical, garnering over 9,000 views in a day (shown below).