Brennan Lee Mulligan's 'I Cannot Win' Monologue
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About
Brennan Lee Mulligan's "I Cannot Win" Monologue is a viral video in which comedian Brennan Lee Mulligan goes on a long-winded, articulate rant on the Dropout TV show Game Changer after he realizes that it was always impossible for him to win a game devised by the host, Sam Reich. The monologue has been parodied online in numerous ways, including video remixes, animations, and a copypasta.
Origin
On May 8th, 2020, season 2, episode 6 of Game Changer,[1] titled "Yes or No," aired on Dropout TV. In Game Changer, three improv comedians partake in a "game show" with the caveat being they don't know how to score points beforehand, and they learn how each episode's "game" works as the episode goes on. In "Yes or No," Brennan Lee Mulligan, Zac Oyama and Ally Beardsley are given the simple task of saying "Yes" or "No." As the episode goes on, Ally and Zac accumulate points for answering "correctly," whereas Brennan remains at 0 points for the entire episode. At the end, Brennan realizes that the "right" answer is the opposite of whatever he says, causing him to rant at host Sam Reich.
On May 9th, 2020, YouTube[4] user Cimmerian Blue uploaded the clip of Mulligan's rant, gaining over 3.8 million views in nearly three years (shown below).
I know what’s going on here. I know what’s going on here. Okay? I do. And if you want me to wander backstage to spill the beans… I’m the only one out of the loop, it would seem… and if we check my point total here-- I don’t NEED to walk to the front, because I know what it is. It’s a big ol’ GOOSE EGG, GANG. It’s a FAT ZERO. HELLO!! A little LATE ADDITION to the numerical symbol chart brought to us from our friends in Arabia, a little bit of trivia that I happen to know about the history of numbers. That kind of little tidbit would serve me well in most trivia games, unless it had been RIGGED FROM THE BEGINNING! Oh, I’ve only just BEGUN to pull the thread on this sweater, friends. You would THINK in a game where there are only TWO possible correct choices, that one would STUMBLE INTO the right answer every so often, wouldn’t you? In fact, the probability of NEVER guessing right in the full game is a STATISTICAL WONDER, and yet, HERE WE ARE. Introduced at the top of the game as a champion, what do you think that means? Icarus, flying too close to the sun. But it seems Daedalus, our little master crafter over here, had some wax wings of his own, didn’t he? Wanted to see his son fall. Fall from the sky. Oh, how CLOSE TO THE SUN he flew! Well I’m NOT HAVING IT. I solved your labyrinth, puzzle master! The minotaur‘s escaped and you’re gonna get the horns, buddy! I CANNOT WIN!
Spread
Over the following years, the monologue was remixed on YouTube, animated, and turned into a copypasta. The monologue was added to /r/copypasta[2] on October 16th, 2020. On September 5th, Tumblr[3] user thespaghettipolicy cross-stitched the monologue onto a piece of cloth (shown below).
On June 9th, 2021, YouTube[5] user deJessias edited the monologue so that it was set to "In the Hall of the Mountain King," gaining over 938,000 views in nearly two years (shown below, left). On December 16th, 2022, YouTube[6] user DeepBlueInk posted an animation of the monologue, gaining over 1 million views in three months (shown below, right).
Various Examples
Search Interest
Unavailable
External References
[2] Reddit – /r/copypasta
[3] Tumblr – thespaghettipolicy
[4] YouTube – Brennan Lee Mulligan loses his mind on game changer
[5] YouTube – Brennan Lee Mulligan slowly losing his mind on that one Game Changer episode
[6] YouTube – Brennan Lee Mulligan Loses It – Game Changer Animated
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